Today I feel pathetic and weak. 

I am home resting because I have this weird flue type thing that's gotten the best of me. I tried to go in to Daughters and as soon as I hopped off the moto I wanted to throw up. 

I'm not sure what bug I've got but my head is heavy and I'm just. not. feeling 100%...

So, I've spent the last few hours at home surfing the web on my cool new kindle-fire (thanks AIM) and reading a couple blogs by Jamie The Very Worst Missionary. She's not your typical missionary, neither am I, that's why I like her. She has a really awesome picture wearing aviator glasses, watches "The Bachelor" and uses a couple curse words every now and then. Reading her blogs has been refreshing because I can relate to her. 

She's authentic and real and human all BEFORE she's a missionary!

A few blogs back I asked what people thought of when they thought of missionaries. I disappointingly didn't get as much feed-back as I would've liked. But, even thanks to the few responses I did get, it was clear that there is a stereotype that fits the term. I never responded with my thoughts. So, here they are....bare with me.

I feel that there's this cool new trend in the American Church at least about having a heart for "missions." I have a couple issues with the trendiness of it all. First, missions shouldn't be a trend because trends wear out and God's heart for people never wears out. Second, people who are at "home" then tend to forget that they are called to be just as much missionaries right where they are amongst their friends, families and co-workers in their communities where they already know the culture and speak the language. And third, people who are oversees then get put on some kind of pedestal and are thought of as super people by the people in our churches back home. FYI, this puts a lot of pressure on us and creates a false perception that it's not okay for us to be weak, to struggle with faith, with sin, to get frustrated, tired and sick (like I am today).

I would just like to clear the air and remind everyone that we too are people, not super people who are just trying to learn what it looks like to love God and love others authentically...

The only difference? We just happen to be doing it oversees. 

Oh yeah, and it's okay to have a bad day. 

Thank you Jamie for creating the space to be honest! It feels really, really good!